80 8th Ave #600, New York, NY 10011
signs of emotional abuse

9 Signs Of Emotional Abuse

The definition of emotional abuse is vague and can be interpreted in many ways. 

Likewise, the signs of emotional abuse can also be difficult to pinpoint and understand.

There are, however, some general characteristics that are often associated with emotional abuse. 

Emotional abuse is a form of manipulation that is used to control and dominate another person. 

It can involve verbal assaults, such as name calling, insults, and put-downs. It can also involve the use of threats and intimidation to keep the victim in line. 

Emotional abusers often use guilt and shame to make their victims feel unworthy and inferior. 

They may also isolate the victim from friends and family members, making them dependent on the abuser for support.

If you’re worried that you or someone you care about might be suffering from emotional abuse, here are 9 signs of emotional abuse that might help you figure it out.

They may not all be present in every situation, but if you experience any of them it’s time to take a step back and figure out what’s going on.

signs of emotional abuse

Manipulation

Manipulation is both a sign of and type of emotional abuse that is often used by abusers to control their victims.

Abusers will use tactics such as guilt, shame, and fear to get what they want from their victims.

The abuser may also use lies and false promises in order to coerce their victim into doing what they want them to do. 

Manipulation can be very damaging to victims, as it can erode their self-esteem and make them feel like they are not good enough to be genuinely cared about by anyone.

It can also cause victims to doubt themselves and their own personal decisions.

The effects of manipulation can be long-lasting and can even lead to PTSD in some extreme cases.

When dealing with a manipulative person, there are ways that you can handle yourself and the situation so that you don’t end up losing your sense of self.

Manipulation

Why People Put Blame On Others?

We may never know why someone chose to abuse us emotionally, but that doesn’t mean we can’t find healing. 

It’s important to understand that the abuser is responsible for their own actions. 

They choose to hurt us and they alone are responsible for their behavior.

We need to focus on our own healing journey and not dwell on what the abuser did or why they did it. 

This isn’t easy, but it is possible with time and support. 

We can find peace and closure by forgiving ourselves and the abuser.

It’s easy to place blame on our abuser for the emotional abuse we suffer and that is often the right thing to do, but it can also become an obstacle to healing.

We want to make someone accountable for the pain we’ve experienced but we must also accept that there are certain people who will simply never feel bad for what they have done to us no matter how much we try to show and tell them.

Ultimately, it is up to us to take responsibility for our own healing and, though it hurts, we must accept that not everyone feels what we feel.

It's all your fault

Isolation From Family And Friends

Family and friends provide a critical support network for victims of emotional abuse, offering a safe refuge and emotional stability. 

For many victims, their family and friends offer the only support network they have

These individuals can provide a safe refuge and emotional stability when victims are struggling to cope with the abuse.

Family and friends are often the first ones to recognize that something is wrong. 

They may see bruises or hear stories that don’t add up. 

When an abuser isolates the victim from these important people in her life, they are further isolated and deprived of the resources they need to escape the abusive situation. 

This can be a very effective tool for the abuser, as it limits the victim’s ability to get help and increases their feelings of loneliness and helplessness, making them less resistant against further abuse.

Smearing The Victim’s Character

If someone is being emotionally abused, one of the abuser’s main tactics and one of the classic signs of emotional abuse is to try to undermine the victim’s self-esteem. 

They may do this by telling the victim that they are worthless, ugly, stupid, or any other negative attribute. 

This can make it very difficult for the victim to leave the abusive relationship, as they may start to believe that they are not worthy of better treatment.

The abuser will also often try to turn others against the victim. 

They may spread malicious rumors about the victim or tell outright lies about them. 

This can make it difficult for the victim to have any support from their friends or family. 

It can also make it hard for the victim to get help, as many people may be reluctant to disbelieve what the abuser has told them about the victim.

Emotional abuse can be very damaging to a person’s self-esteem and can leave them feeling isolated and alone.

signs of emotional abuse

Withholding Love And Support

People who withhold love and support from their partners as a means of manipulation or coercion are engaging in emotional abuse. 

This type of behavior can be incredibly damaging to a relationship, as it makes the victim feel unsupported, alone, and unworthy. 

Victims of emotional abuse often feel like they can’t do anything right, and that they are not good enough for their partner or even for anyone else. 

This can lead to a feeling of hopelessness and despair. 

If you are in a relationship with someone who is withholding love and support from you, please seek help. 

There are many resources available to you, and you don’t have to suffer in silence.

Intimate partner violence can include throwing out your things

Constant Put-Downs

When you’re constantly put down by someone you love, it’s hard not to feel like you’re worthless. 

Emotional abuse can wear on your self-esteem and make you feel like you’re not good enough no matter what you do. 

If this is happening to you, know that it’s not your fault. 

You don’t deserve to be treated this way.

There are ways to heal from emotional abuse, but it takes time and effort. 

It’s important to have support from friends or family during this process. 

Talk about what happened and how it made you feel. 

Journaling can also be helpful in exploring your thoughts and feelings as well as in helping future you become better at recognizing the signs of emotional abuse.

Finally, remember that you are worthy of love and respect. 

You deserve a partner who will treat you with kindness and respect – not one who makes you feel bad about yourself.

signs of emotional abuse

Blaming The Victim

It’s always easy to blame the victim

When something bad happens, we want someone to be at fault. 

It’s much more comfortable to think that someone else is responsible for our problems than it is to accept that sometimes bad things just happen. 

This is especially true in cases of emotional abuse. 

The abuser is often seen as the bad guy, while the victim is pitied and forgiven.

But blaming the victim isn’t fair. 

It takes the focus off of the abuser, who is actually responsible for the abuse, and puts it on the victim instead. 

The victim didn’t do anything wrong; they were simply unlucky enough to be in an abusive relationship. 

Blaming them only serves to make them feel worse about themselves and makes it harder for them to leave the relationship.

So don’t blame the victim.

signs of emotional abuse

Using Children To Manipulate

Unfortunately, one common tactic of emotionally abusive parents is to use their children as sacrificial pawns in order to get what they want. 

For example, a parent might try to guilt their spouse into doing something by saying things like “I did everything for you and our children, and this is how you repay me?” or “You’re the reason our child is such a mess.” 

They may also use threats or intimidation in order to control their child, such as telling them they’ll be sent away if they don’t behave properly.

Another version of this is the way that one parent may weaponize their children against their partner in the event of a separation and use them in order to harm and/or extract what they want from their partner/former partner.

In these sorts of cases, the wellbeing of the children and their need for their other parent is, at best, a vague afterthought for the abuser and those children can be said to be victims of abuse every bit as much as the partner/former partner of the abuser.

I'm divorcing your father

Threats And Intimidation Signs Of Emotional Abuse

Threats and intimidation are two common signs of emotional abuse.

Threats can be as simple as “I’ll hit you if you don’t do what I say,” or as complex as making a threat to harm or kill someone the victim loves and/or dropping veiled hints about taking away the children. 

Intimidation can involve using physical size or strength to scare someone, making threats, or even just constantly being aggressive and hostile.

It can also involve making someone feel scared or uncomfortable, like standing too close, making nasty comments, or invading personal space. 

Both threats and intimidation are designed to control and manipulate the victim.

Angry Man making fist

Conclusion

Emotional abuse is a type of abuse that can be characterized by verbal or emotional attacks on one’s partner, intended to inflict fear, insecurity, and pain.

The abuser typically relies on intimidation and control to wield power over their victim, and often denies their victim basic human needs like love and respect.

There are many warning signs that someone is being emotionally abused, but it’s often hard to tell if something is wrong.

We hope that this list of signs has helped you and please do not hesitate to reach out if you feel that you need help getting through an abusive situation.

If you suspect someone you know is being abused, it is important to reach out and offer your support.

If the victim is open to it, you can provide a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. 

You can also offer practical help, such as arranging for safe housing or transportation. 

Most importantly, let the victim know that you believe them and that you want to help them get through this difficult time.

If you are in need of immediate help for domestic violence, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn

Share:

Facebook
Twitter
Pinterest
LinkedIn
More

Related Posts

dbt graduate group

MindWell NYC: DBT Graduate Group

Anxiety is one of the most common mental health disorders, yet it affects people in many different ways. For some, it presents during stressful situations or social engagements. 

Natural Ways to Nix Anxiety at Night

Anxiety is one of the most common mental health disorders, yet it affects people in many different ways. For some, it presents during stressful situations or social engagements.